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Rockets aren't SEO Science, Mr. Pasternack

Warning! This is a silly article. No offense intended to Dave Pasternack.
My image of a Rocket Scientist is of a fellow in a long white coat, snowy hair somewhat disarrayed, and yet exuding an aura of wisdom that commands respect from all he knows. I picture him working in a spotless lab, doing brilliant things, while his colleagues speak in hushed tones around him so as not to interrupt him in his brilliant rocket-building endeavors.
The life of a humble, small business SEO stands in sharp contrast to this sterling image of a life lived by that awing and universally-worshiped individual – the rocket scientist. Why do I imagine that during his career, lived way up there in the rarified atmosphere of the gifted, the rocket scientist has never had to encounter any of the following things:
1) He has never had to ask his landlord to wait another 5 days for the rent because NASA doesn’t pay him on the first of the month.
2) He has never been approached by someone whose first words are that they want a price break because they aren’t really sure what he does is worth much.
3) He has never had to seriously commit himself to learning what the competition is in the dog pyjama industry.
4) He has never put in the hours of work that lead up to signing a contract, only to have the other guy tell him, “my neighbor’s brother’s cousin said he’d do the job for me for free.”
5) He’s never had to convince anyone that it’s not going to be a good move to include a midi file of Elvis’ greatest hits as a key function in the design of the rocket ship.
6) People at social functions never come away from the party with the vague impression that his name was Essie O.
7) No one ever says to him, “but you built the rocket, right? You mean now we’ve got to pay to add fuel to it? Aren’t we done yet?”
8) No one expects him to build a rocket that goes to the top in a month and a half.
So, as you can see, the rocket scientist really has it easy. His daily bread is not dependent upon him fielding all sorts of weird questions, situations and problems. He gets to sit in his lab, doing great deeds for which he is duly praised. The SEO, by contrast, has to make people happy, hold business conversations with working parents whose one-year-olds are teething at the top of their lungs, be incredibly polite when telling people that their websites are unfit for human consumption, and keep their clients away from third party entities who cold call them telling them that their website contains a fatal error!
All jokes aside, we love the work we do, but just like any other job, it has its unique challenges and stresses. Because every time we take on a new client and have to get into the mindset of their company, their industry and their customers, we have got to be extremely skilled at working with people. Never mind what goes into on-page SEO, linkbuilding, social media marketing and all that jazz. NASA doesn’t care if the rocket scientist doesn’t form a relationship of personal trust with them – our clients do!